EMOTIONAL WOUND THESAURUS

FINDING OUT ONE'S CHILD WAS ABUSED



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NOTES:
Parents have many roles, but one of the most instinctive is that of the protector. Keeping one's child safe is not just a moral duty; it kicks into gear on the most basic of levels the moment that child comes into a person's care. So when someone discovers that their child has been abused, it shakes them to the core, challenging their beliefs about their capabilities and worth as a parent. The lies and associated guilt and self-blame associated with this wound are more deeply entrenched if the child said nothing because she felt she couldn't go to her parent or if the child tried to reveal what was happening—e.g., she acted out and the behavior was written off as attention-seeking—or she tried to say something but wasn't immediately believed. The following are examples of how a parent might discover what has happened—when they learn, after the fact, that…

EXAMPLES:
Their partner or a close relative had abused the child
The abuse occurred at a trusted family friend's house
Their child was hit or touched by a teacher or person in authority
The abuse took place while the child was in the care of a neighbor or babysitter
The child suffered abuse while the parent was asleep or in another area of the home
The abuse occurred while the child was on a supervised trip (for school, church, sports, or a club)
The abuse happened during a custody visit (either by the ex or someone associated with them)

WOUND CATEGORY:
Crime and Victimization, Misplaced Trust and Betrayals, Traumatic Events

BASIC NEEDS OFTEN COMPROMISED BY THIS WOUND:
physiological needs, safety and security, love and belonging, esteem and recognition, self-actualization

LIES THAT MAY DEVELOP FOR CHARACTERS WITH THIS WOUND:
They're a terrible parent because they couldn't protect their child
They should have seen what was happening and stopped it
Their child is safer with someone else
If they don't do a better job as a protector, this will happen again
Their child isn't safe with anyone but them

THE CHARACTER MAY FEAR:
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POSSIBLE RESPONSES AND RESULTS:
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POSITIVE ATTRIBUTES THAT MAY RESULT:
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NEGATIVE TRAITS THAT MAY RESULT:
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TRIGGERS THAT MIGHT AGGRAVATE THIS WOUND:
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STEPS TOWARD HEALING:
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OPPORTUNITIES TO FACE OR OVERCOME THIS WOUND:
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